OK, So It's Not Bipolar...

I went to my new psychiatrist today for the first time. He read my history, and we talked about a lot of stuff:

He tends to believe that I show symptoms of depression and ADD/ADHD. I'm going to take this test related to the ADD/ADHD stuff and see how I score. Doc seems to think I'll score high for ADD/ADHD.

Also, I'm having to change my meds, which I don't mind that much. One of the side effects of the Depakote is weight gain. Since I've been on it, I've gained about 30 lbs. So I'm looking forward to not having that. I'm increasing my dose of Wellbutrin, and gradually moving off the Effexor-XR and on Celexa.

I felt really great after the appointment because it was as though I'm getting a better understanding of who I am. I can get messed up about having these disorders, and when other things go awry in my life, I'm not always able to tell whether it's the disorder or some other weakness in my character.

Well, heck. I've gotta get home to my lovely wife and beautiful daughter.

Learning Grammar

Keisha came home from preschool today and showed Jennie a piece of paper. Her class practiced tracing their names. When Jennie asked her whose name was on the paper, she replied, "Keisha's." Jennie then tried to correct her by getting her to be grammatically correct and say "No, it's my name." Keisha responded, "No, Mommy. It's Keisha's!"

What's New?

I've updated the website to include some new pictures of Keisha.

I've added archive pages to this journal.

6/8/2003, Update: I updated the links to reflect the new location of the journal at BlogSpot.

Dreams

Been having some interesting dreams lately. Unfortunately, I can't remember all the details. In one dream I needed to be at a certain bus stop or something like that, so that I could take an important trip somewhere. It's really hard to put all the details down, because they are racing through my head.

Self-injury - Scab-picking

I've been researching a little on self-injury, because I pick at scabs to make them bleed. The main site I've found is for the American Self-Harm Information Clearinghouse. I currently have a big scab on my face to the lower right of my mouth. It's really itchy, and it hurts. Since this morning, I've been able to keep from picking at it.

Sometimes, like when I'm in the shower, I've used the razor to cut it. Typically, it starts out as something small and eventually becomes big. I've used hydrogen peroxide to help clean it, and some anti-bacterial ointment to help keep it moist. When the scab on my face gets dry, it becomes really itchy and painful, like it is now.

I Saw A LISW

Went to see the LISW today. An LISW is a Licensed Independent Social Worker, who, in essence, is a psychologist. Unlike a psychiatrist, he cannot prescribe medication.

It went very well. I have Bipolar Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I think I may delve into this more at a later time.

Justifiable Use of Force

Today is Martin Luther King, Jr.'s birthday. As many know, he was a civil rights activist that worked for peace through nonviolent means.

Are there any times when violence is right? What a difficult question to answer. Here are my thoughts:

Ever since the terrorist attacks on the US last year, I have believed that it is necessary to use force. We gave the Taliban time to turn over Osama bin Laden, and they let it run out. As a result, we dropped bombs on them.

On a much smaller scale, I think about times when my wife and I must discipline our daughter. We have set up boundaries and expectations for her. When she goes outside of those boundaries, we have a moral obligation to discipline her, so that she can learn to respect authority. Sometimes, then, we need to spank her. Other times we remove priveleges.

I believe that the United States and its allies have taken a similar approach in the war on terrorism. Basically, President Bush has stated that terrorists will be disciplined for their acts of terror. Financial assets have been frozen. Also, we've used military force.

Thus, I see our current situation as one in which the use of force is justified. The principle is the same in law enforcement. A police officer tells a gun-wielding suspect to drop his or her weapon. If he or she does not, then in some cases, the officer may have to use deadly force.

What do you think?
Feel free to drop me a line (i.e., leave a 'guidepost').

(Darn it!) The last post did not go through! Erggggh!!

Library book returned, 57 years overdue

STATE COLLEGE, Pa. (AP) -- A rare 17th-century book in Latin has been returned to a Penn State library 57 years after it was last checked out. The good news is there won't be any late fees.

This might be me. I am notorious for having overdue items from the library.

2002 Short Story Contest

The local paper is having a short story contest, and I'm considering entering it. I wrote one in middle school, but that was a long time ago, so I'm a little out of practice with it. I've written poetry and some other things, but not a short story.

I don't even know why I'm saying this. It's as though I'm already believing that I can't do it! How faithless!

Now, I just need an idea...

Music is like an elixir to our souls

... and you can quote me on that!

I have an eclectic taste in music. Depending on the situation, I will listen to anything from smooth jazz to speed metal, and just about anything in between. Music is a universal language of emotion, mood, and message. Thank God for it!

Medication

Feeling much better now. The meds have kicked in. I'm taking 225 mg of Effexor-XR, 750 mg of Depakote, and 100 mg of Wellbutrin.

Prone to Depression

Hi. I'm feeling incredibly depressed right now, to the point of tears. I don't know exactly where it's coming from. Perhaps that we're into the new year and I don't have a clear vision for what I want to accomplish. Part of me doesn't want to go through with it at all - just stay where I am (as though that would really make me feel better). I don't know. I am prone to depression, and I take medicine to help alleviate it.

I took my meds about 15 minutes ago, so I'm waiting for them to kick in. You know, when a depressive episode kicks in, I really hate that I have it. It feels frustrating, as though I'm out of control of what's going on. I just look forward to it passing.

Misc Jottings, Mind Leakage, Etc.

Funny... I just realized that I forgot to publish my last post. Kinda like when you forget to save a document before your computer crashes. Man, I hate when that happens!

Anyhow, I'm glad that some of the changes to the website are working, and I'm encouraged that friends and family are visiting.

Next, I need to learn how to link to other weblogs. And, after that, work on world peace (just kidding!).

Looking at other folks weblogs inspires me. It's neat how some folks have integrated this into their own websites.

OK. I've made some changes to how this looks, and I'm going to see the results.

Can You Say 'OOPS'?

Check this out, excerpted from a spot in the NY Post yesterday:

January 8, 2002 -- CNN yanks 'sexy' Paula spot

IN a wacky attempt to stave off the ratings onslaught of rival Fox News Channel, CNN went bonkers over the weekend by shamelessly promoting mother-of-three anchor Paula Zahn as "sexy."

Media-watchers were startled when a racy commercial for Zahn's show, "American Morning with Paula Zahn," ran on CNN over the weekend.

"Where can you find a morning news anchor who's provocative, super-smart, oh, yeah, and just a little sexy?" a male announcer asked during the 20-second spot. The word "sexy" flashed in red letters and an image of the well-coiffed blond anchor popped up on screen.

The ad was pulled yesterday morning. Walter Isaacson, chairman and CEO of CNN's Newsgroup, groaned in a statement: "It was a major blunder by our promotions department. The ad was never seen or approved by anyone outside of the promo department.
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Greetings, folks!

I am working on the format of this journal, so that it will appear more like the other pages within our web site. I am still somewhat new to HTML, etc., so bear with me. I'm actually thinking of making the journal part of a frameset and have the navigation buttons on the left side. These buttons would exist on every page. Still coming up with ideas. Web building is a lot of fun!

Wendy's Loses Its Father

Today I found out that Dave Thomas, the founder and spokesman for Wendy's International, had passed away from liver cancer. What a great guy he was! The commercials I saw on TV weren't at all pretentious, which, from what I read, describes the man who founded the company.

I can still remember the "Where's the Beef?" set of commercials in 1980. What a riot!

He died extremely wealthy, according to a Forbes report.

I also loved that he supported adoption so much. He will be missed in the flesh, but I believe we'll still see him, perhaps in cartoon form, like "The Colonel" from KFC.

It's showtime, baby!

Good afternoon, world! As I listened to a radio talk show yesterday, I heard the idea of a Dick Vitale alarm clock. Can you imagine?

- "Time to wake up! It's showtime, baby!"
- "It's almost 8, you're gonna be late!"

I've never heard Dick Vitale announce before, but hearing this was a hoot.

OK. I know I said I was going to leave, but I still had to verify that I could publish this to our website. I'm pleased that I have been able to publish, but I'm not satisfied with how everything looks. It all looks like it was "smooshed" together, which, of course, it was.

OK. I'm going to try to publish and then, I will leave.

Bye!

As you may have guessed by now, I should be going home, but I think I'm liking this stuff...

Ideas for the Family Website

I've been gathering ideas to include on our family's website. I plan to include some information about our daughter, Keisha, who is hard of hearing. This search has led me to some interesting sites, such as the following:

• Phonak MicroLink MLx FM System, which we recently obtained;
• Audiology Department, Children's Hospital Medical Center, Cincinnati, Ohio, where we obtained her hearing aids and FM system;
• Children's Medical Center, Dayton, Ohio, where Keisha's current audiologist/speech therapist is located;
• Community Services for the Deaf in Dayton, Ohio
• OtiKids Web Site, from Oticon, who made Keisha's hearing aids

OK. So that's it for now. Later.

Update: Some other things to include on our family's website include

• family pictures
• "About" pages for Dan, Jennie, and Keisha
• family mission statement
• enhanced guestbook with additional fields, etc. (such as, how in the World Wide Web did you find this site?)

Either I'll use this forum to desribe what is new and as a journal, or I'll use something else. Update: To help visitors know what is new to the Family home page, I've provided the means to sign up for a mailing list on the home page itself, via NotifyList.com. I plan to send this list on a monthly basis. So sign up now!

First Post

OK. This is the first time I've done this. I thought is was a good idea, based on what I've read elsewhere. I am so new to web-building and web publishing, and I am so happy that a forum exists for me to type what's going on inside my mind.

Question: Is it possible to identify how many websites are actually available on the Web?

Feb 6, 2008 Update: Apparently someone knows: How Big Is The Web?