Just Checking In

My time is up at the library. Actually, Jennie and I need to get home before Keisha's bus does!

Hope you all had a wonderful weekend! Let's make it a great week!

By the way...

find out more at blog.meetup.com

Are you spending too much for your car?

CNN reports:

Your best deal on a car is one you can truly afford. And that means keeping an eye on the rest of your budget while considering your monthly payment, the term of your loan and the total cost of owning the car over a five-year period.

Ten years ago, when I was about to graduate from college, I sought out information like that in this article. Now I find that it's time to do this again. We will soon have to say final farewells to "Maxine," the car Mom left us when she moved back to Texas.

Sympathy for the Devil on 'Alias'

This MSN Entertainment article is all about "Arvin Sloane, a villain fans love to hate," adroitly portrayed by Ron Rifkin, who said:

My wife and I went over to Paris, which was difficult, to do press for the show. Apparently, it's a huge hit in Paris. People stopped me on the street saying, "Mr. Sloane, we love your show. You're an evil man."

Rifkin provides some other background into Sloane's character, which is definitely worth reading if you enjoy the show.

I'm an avid fan of the drama series, and I hope that ABC will keep for the next season. Yesterday (22 Apr 2004) I read in the Dayton Daily News that it's on the infamous "bubble". It was there last year, as this post on SciFi2K.com news archives from Feb 2003 mentions:

Feb 1: Alias On the Bubble: Fans of Alias might want to get the cards and letters ready - the save the show web domain name bought and sites designed designed. ABC is getting tired of Alias, despite the post superbowl ratings. Even with the 14.7 ratings it was the lowest post superbowl rated program ever. If the ratings don't start an upswing soon Jennifer Garner will be spending all her time as Electra on the big screen. Alias kicks ass people, but for some it might be too complicated. Like so many other shows, ratings rein supreme, quality does not.

The Tractor Trailer and the Tollbooth - JOKE ALERT!

The driver of a huge tractor trailer lost control of his rig and plowed into an empty tollbooth and smashed it to pieces:

He climbed down from the wreckage and looked around. Within a matter of minutes, another truck pulled up and unloaded a crew of workers.

The men picked up each broken piece of the former tollbooth and spread some kind of creamy substance on it, then they began fitting the pieces together. In less than a half hour, they had the entire tollbooth reconstructed and good as new.

"Astonishing!" the truck driver said to the crew chief. "What was that white stuff you used to get all of the pieces together?"

The crew chief said, "Oh, that was Tollgate Booth Paste."

Thanks to Dale U. for the email!

In Case You Forgot to Get Me Something

... I just had a birthday. I'll need to share how I celebrated it at another time.

Following Up on Those Thoughts I Had

I began writing this post over a week ago, and I just now have had a chance to come back to it. I've taken a lot of this post from an email I sent to Bene Diction, the Official Canuck of 'Journey Inside My Mind'. It's good for others to read, too:

• Background
• Relationships Closer to Home
• Physical Struggles
• Spiritual Struggles
• Able to Bear It
• Longing to Be Free From It All
• What God Says

Background

As I mentioned recently, I've tended of late to use this blog as an outlet for my emotions. I'm no longer able to provide daily updates, so that may explain the overall change in tone. Were I able to provide daily updates, other readers would be able to see a more balanced picture of what's going on in my life.

Relationships Closer to Home

I am grateful to God for the close relationships I have with brothers and sisters here in the church in Dayton, especially, and with those who are not as close. I am grateful, too, for the therapy sessions and the medication that helps with my moods, etc.

Physical Struggles

Last month I was hurt at work, but I'm getting it taken care of through the Ohio Bureau of Worker's Compensation. Over the past several weeks I've undergone physical therapy on my right hand, which has definitely helped. The work restrictions were lifted this past Tuesday. It's getting better all the time.

Spiritual Struggles

While chatting with a brother in Christ on the phone some weeks ago, I mentioned that I don't know what to pray for -- it seems that there is so much. I know that God knows what we need before we ask him, and the Holy Spirit helps us when we are unable to communicate with words. So I'm confident that God is taking care of me/us. This brother, after hearing me share, said, "It sounds like you need a miracle."

Able to Bear It

I know that our circumstances could always get worse. I know that there are others who have life much harder than I. I also know that God will not allow me to be tempted beyond what I can bear. I just never thought I could bear so much, if you know what I mean! (lol)

Longing to Be Free From It All

Sure, I've had "passive suicidal ideation," as it's known in the psychology world. I have just wanted relief. I have no plans to take myself out; I know from God's word that it's not my place to say when, where, and how -- my life is in God's hands.

What God Says

I am grateful to have been reminded from the Scriptures, that, whenever suicide is mentioned, it's always in the context of being ungodly. I'm reminded of

• King Saul in 1 Chronicles 10, specifically verses 4, 13-14
• King Zimri in 1 Kings 16:15-20
• Judas, Matthew 27:1-10 and Acts 1:18-19

Similarly, there are other examples where people felt like dying but didn't give into it (Moses and Elijah).

It's not my life to take:

"I know, O LORD , that a man's life is not his own;
it is not for man to direct his steps." (Jeremiah 10:23)

Keeping these convictions has been a tremendous help.

Happy Birthday to Me! - 2004

I was born this day thirtysomething years ago!

It's My Life - It's My Journey

Just a reminder: I whine, moan, rant, cry, etc. here for my benefit. This is a Journey Inside My Mind. I may have already figured out the solution to a problem, and I just use this forum to vent my emotions.

Comments and traffic from others to this site is secondary to me. Sometimes I just need someone to listen.

I'm afraid that this may alienate some regular readers, and I guess I'll have to live with that. I began this blog for myself, and I'll continue to blog for myself.

Thanks!

Not Dead Yet

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
2 Corinthians 4:8-9 (NIV)

A righteous man may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all
Psalm 34:19 (NIV)

If two weeks ago I felt like I was underneath a raincloud, then last week I was in the sunshine. Being open with brothers and sisters from church, as well as my therapist, has been extremely helpful.

I'd felt like David did, in writing Psalm 13 - "How long, O Lord? How long?" I guess I just have a better peace of mind than I did earlier. It's not that the circumstances have changed as much as it is my outlook.

(More Than) Three Chords and the Truth

Time for an update on my "progress" in learning the acoustic guitar. But first:

'All Along the Watchtower' Quote

All I got is a red guitar
Three chords
And the truth

All I got is a red guitar
The rest is up to you
-- from "All Along the Watchtower" by U2, from Rattle and Hum

Passionate Practicing

I got an acoustic guitar as an early Christmas present from my wife last December. I have been passionate about learning to play it since then, and I'm encouraged by my progress. I played an original song for my wife in front of some married members at church, and I currently play it during the children's ministry class I help to teach on Sundays.

That Dubious F-major Chord

Learning the F major chord is one of the hardest things for new guitarists, and I've been no exception. The hard part about it is that you're supposed to use the index finger to fret the first two strings: check out this picture. Getting this to work and making the strings ring has been a bit of a challeng.

Chord Progressions

This morning, however, while practicing, I finally figured out how to make it work. So I gave myself a bit of a pat on the back. BTW, I've learned that the chord progression: C-Am-F-G7 is the same progression used for "Heart and Soul" and other oldies. Now that I can play the F chord, I can do this progression.

Top 10 Cancelled TV Shows

I'd emailed this link to myself awhile back because I wanted to mention it here. I can't say that I agree with this list because I haven't seen or heard of a lot of the shows mentioned.

My Life In A Nutshell

I cannot remember how I first stumbled upon Debbie's comic blog, but I can say that I've really enjoyed it for quite some time. She recently started updating again, after a long hiatus.

I'm Still Standing - Yeah, Yeah, Yeah

Greetings from the public library, where I can simply get lost in the veritable cornucopia of reading material. I have had the pleasure of visiting a number of the library's branches, and I've found something to enjoy at every one of them.

I'm in a sort of mental funk right now:

It may be related to how I've spent Saturdays and Sundays. I work late on Saturday, get a few hours of sleep on Sunday before church, and after church, get a couple more hours before heading back to work on Sunday afternoon. By the time Monday morning comes, I'm trying to get back to normal waking and sleeping.

I'm writing this intial post of the day to inform you that I'm hanging in there. I haven't checked email or even been on the computer for an entire week, so I've got a lot of catching up to do. One email account lists 285 unread messages. Fortunately most of them are spam.

Bear with me. I have more to come later.

For Now, I'm Okay

My time is up at the computer, so I'll just say that things are going okay. I'll have to get to the PC and blog tomorrow perhaps.

The Knock-Down

[via email from Steve K.]

A college professor, an avowed atheist, was teaching his class. He shocked most of his students when he flatly stated he was going to prove there is no God:

Addressing the ceiling he shouted: "God, if you are real, I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you 15 minutes!"

The lecture room fell silent. You could have heard a pin fall.

Ten minutes went by. Again he taunted God, saying, "Here I am, God. I'm still waiting."

His count-down got to the last couple of minutes when a Marine, just released from active duty and newly registered in the class, walked up to the professor, hit him full force in the face and sent him flailing from his lofty platform.

The students were shocked and a little scared. But the young Marine took a seat in the front row and sat silent. The class also fell silent...waiting.

Eventually, the professor came to, quite shaken. He looked at the young Marine in the front row. When the professor regained his senses enough to speak he asked: "What's the matter with you? Why did you do that?"

"God was busy. He sent me."

The LORD said, "I have indeed seen the misery of my people in Egypt. I have heard them crying out because of their slave drivers, and I am concerned about their suffering. So I have come down to rescue them from the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out of that land into a good and spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey—the home of the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites. And now the cry of the Israelites has reached me, and I have seen the way the Egyptians are oppressing them. So now, go. I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt."

Exodus 3:7-10 (emphasis added)

The Mental Patients - JOKE ALERT!

Jim and Mary were both patients in a mental hospital.

One day, while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end:

He sank like a stone to the bottom and stayed there. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out. When the medical director became aware of Mary's heroic act, he immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as he now considered her to be mentally stable.

When he went to tell her the news, he said, "Mary, I have good news & bad news. The good news is you're being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you've regained your senses".

"The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hanged himself in the bathroom with the belt of his robe. I am so sorry, but he's dead".

Mary replied, "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry."

[via email from Mom]

VSP: Very Special Post 2004

Because I can, I've created a post with the following date/timestamp:

04/04/04 04:04

There's gotta be something significant about that.